Stone Cold (1991)

This remains one of the more infamous examples of a professional athlete attempting to become a movie star as former NFL linebacker Brian Bosworth stars as Joe Huff, a tough Alabama cop who goes undercover with the FBI to infiltrate and take down a militia group of bikers lead by Chains Cooper (Lance Henricksen) who has ambitions much more dangerous than just being a motorcyle club.  Bosworth's pro football career ended prematurely by the time this was released due to injuries and as a result, this film's reputation soured before it even opened in the spring of 1991.  The reviews were bad and it flopped at the box office.  However....what if it actually turned out to be a genuinely GOOD action film? 

As directed by Craig R. Baxley (Action Jackson) who was a former stunt coordinator, this film is jam-packed with impressive action sequences and stunts using various vehicles....and it also features a go-for-broke performance by William Forsythe (Out of Justice, Dick Tracy, American Me, The Rock) as the most menacing member of the motorcycle gang named "Chains."  On the eve of its 35th Anniversary, let's revisit the go-for-broke action film which 2002's XXX only aspired to be!

Host & Editor: Geoff Gershon
Producer: Marlene Gershon 

Transcript

STONE COLD - 1991

Directed by Craig R. Baxley

Starring Brian Bosworth, Lance Henriksen, Arabella Holzbog, Sam McMurray, Richard Gant, Paulo Tocha, David Tress, Evan James Malmuth, Tony Pierce, Billy Million, Robert Winley, Gregory Scott Cummins, and William Forsythe

Genre: Action Thriller 

How can tell when a film is special?? 🤔 Well try this on: our hero dispatches a supermarket robber by causing him to fly leg-first into a massive display of coke cans, two bikers play William Tell by using Uzis to shoot beer cans on their respective shoulders, a judge is blown up on his boat, a an (allegedly) evil priest is murdered RIGHT after conducting a baptism, and then we watch our hero kicking off his morning routine by concocting a nasty smoothie with snickers, orange juice, potato chips, and Tabasco sauce....before feeding it ALL to his pet Kimono dragon. 🙄 And that's just within the first eight minutes! 

So yes this is a "special" movie which has become an annual rewatch for me and might very well be one of the more hidden action gems of the '90's. (It's not even really streaming anywhere.) And I would gather that would be because of its star who let's face it....never did much of note after this.  Though all things considered, he does a decent job for on-screen debut filled with so much action.

The plot itself is absurdly streamlined, feeling very much like a grimier, better version of XXX. Boz plays Joe Huff (good hero name) a flamboyantly dressed cop from Alabama going undercover with the FBI to take down a national biker syndicate who are basically aspiring terrorists involved with drug trafficking planning to murder an Mississippi DA/governor candidate.....and a lot more. Shit gets increasingly DARK in the third act. 😮 And they're lead by a scenery-chewing Lance Henrickson looking very much like his lead vampire from Near Dark, just with fewer shirts. And his second-in-command is played by a uber-scuzzed out William Forsythe (this was released just a couple of months after he played a similar villain in Out For Justice)....ok what else do you need to sell this?

It's basically 90 minutes of wall-to-wall balls-out action with gore and explosions aplenty (and ok a generous helping of gratuitous nudity)...and zero fat, this film just moves! Oh sure, there's a romantic subplot but barely...Boz is just playing a man on a mission with feathered hair and the way his character closes out this movie through the end-credits is just a stone cold blast. ;)

Best Needledrop (best song cue or score used throughout runtime of film):

Now back to that Kimono dragon, it’s named “Fido” by the way….it’s admittedly a genuinely goofy way to introduce to Joe Huff’s private life.  Wearing a white head-band and a cut-off white T-shirt over a high-waisted banana hammock while preparing this ridiculous concoction for his pet….what I always found a bit disarming about this sequence was the undeniably catchy mid-tempo pop song which we hear playing over it….pretty generic lyrics if we’re being honest, but with a fun hook and vocals which sounded SOMEWHAT familiar.  Hmm…. (Audio clip) 

Well imagine my delight to find out that this song was actually performed by one of my FAVORITE rock-pop artists of the ‘90’s, it was actually an unreleased track ONLY heard during this film and it didn’t make the cut of her studio debut album to be released two years later…..one of the SEMINAL rock pop albums of the ‘90’s as far as I’m concerned too, 1993’s smash hit, “Tuesday Night Music Club” featuring several popular songs which were just unavoidable during the mid ‘90’s including Leaving Las Vegas, All I Wanna Do, and Strong Enough.  I’m of course referring to the luminous, talented, multiple Grammy-winning, 50 million record-selling singer-songwriter-guitarist from Kennett, Missouri……SHERYL CROW.  I was a HUGE fan too, saw her in solo concern AND with the touring Lillith Fair.  Now do I GET why this particular song didn’t make the cut for her first album?  Sure it’s just not as good and it KIND of sounds more ‘80’s than her eventual ‘90’s roots rock sound.  But still just a fun song and once you know it’s from Crow, you can’t unhear it – this track (which is available on YouTube) is “Welcome To the Real Life.” (Audio clip) 

Wasted Talent (most under-utilized talent involved with film):

Honestly I can’t think of any talent which was wasted in the making of this movie but I just would like to give a SPECIAL shout-out to one of my favorite character actors, one of the TRUE unsung journeymen of film during my lifetime….New York City native, the VOICE….Lance Henriksen.  He plays the head of The Brotherhood….Chains Cooper…and not would I say that he delivers this film’s BEST performance but apparently, pretty much of every line of dialogue of his was improvised…IMPRESSIVE. (Audio clip) 

Of course, I was first introduced to Lance when he played the benevolent android Bishop in previous episode and my all-time favorite movie, Aliens.  Beyond that though, he has just carved out an AMAZING career with over 260 credits including several other favorites of mine including memorable roles in previous episodes Dog Day Afternoon, The Terminator, the aforementioned Near Dark ALONG with future episode Close Encounters of the Third Kind.  He is just a one-of-a-kind actor with a unique look and voice….and he always BRINGS it, especially to villain roles.  I just don’t see this film working NEARLY as well without him in it. (Audio clip) 

Trailer Moment (scene or moment that best describes this movie):

Did I mention just how completely bat-shit the climax of this film gets?  I mean picture if the January 6ers were more heavily armed, a LOT more competent, and they came with a bunch of motorcycles no less…..and this is ALL at the Mississippi state capital no less.  And here’s what’s even crazier….yeah I said this film gets “dark”….even though the “Brotherhood” pretty much gets wiped out in the process, they DO succeed in wreaking havoc including racking up quite a body count, several explosions, and they even wipe out the state’s Supreme Court.  But at least not before our hero Joe Huff gets some licks in INCLUDING what could have been this film’s most impressive money shot: a motorcycle is dispatched towards Huff while inside the courthouse….just GO with it….but he gets out of the way, and……it flies out a third story window smashing into a helicopter! (Audio clip) 

But no, that’s not THE true money shot….in my opinion, THE most rousing moment of this corker of a movie is the very last one: after battered, bruised, and bloodied….Joe Huff simply walks out of the courthouse….and the camera follows him with a medium shot just…..WATCHING him walk out as the credits roll.  And we just FOLLOW him for a full 90 seconds…..the expression on his face never really changes beyond exhaustion….as he walks past reporters, medical personnel, armed military, and just civilians who have fled this craziness.  (Audio clip) 

And this doesn’t go anywhere….he just stops looking forward, freeze frame, and the credits just keep rolling.  I can’t quite figure WHY this ending works so well but it just does…..what’s even crazier is that even during the hey-days of their peak stardom, no action starring Arnold, Sly, nor Clint ever thought to end this way.   They almost came close a few times…..previous episode Predator pretty much ends on Arnie’s soot-covered, exhausted face as he’s flying out of the jungle, Sly’s Rambo pretty much just walks into the wilderness at the end of First Blood Part II.   It’s just SUCH an obvious ICONIC way to end an action film like, you almost wish some bigger star DID this….but nope, The BOZ beat them to the punch and he pulls it off. (Audio clip) 

MVP (person or people most responsible for the success of this film):

Even though the Boz DOES solid work here, he’s also just kind of along for the ride alongside some stronger actors who bring their A-games.  What drives this film’s success is the action which is simply FANTASTIC featuring a ton of next-level stuntwork thanks to director Craig Baxley's strong background as a stunt coordinator before this. (That and Action Jackson which ALSO featured very strong action.) He had done exemplary work also a second unit director on films like Predator and The Warriors....and it shows! I mean there are things done here with various moving vehicles that even James Cameron might marvel at. 😉

Apparently this was a rough, often-delayed, over-budget production which technically started in ’89 and due to various delays including a director change just a couple of weeks into shooting, several location changes, a strike for the technicians, and a COMPLETELY re-tooled plot resulting in millions of dollars of completed footage of Joe Huff’s personal life which was all left on the cutting room floor.  The estimated final budget end up being around $30 million which wasn’t exactly chump change for a vehicle starring a brand new actor.  Honestly though….you can see it all up on the screen and the result is 90 minutes of genuinely thrilling insanity.  For pulling this offer despite an untested star and a pretty ridiculous script, Craig R. Baxley is the MVP. 

Final Rating: 4 stars out of 5 

I just unabashedly love this film, can’t quite explain it but it just rocks hard, wish it was easier to find too and would LOVE to see it on the big screen.  Are you listening Fathom?  Happy 35th Anniversary to one of the more underrated action films of the ‘90’s!

Streaming on YouTube

And that ends another CRACK THE WHIP review!